I came up with three concrete ideas for revision based on what my peers had offered. First I decided to work on explaining the general background of the literacy. Mike quoted that he wanted to know more about how they met and where this occurred for this sentence in the literacy, ‘The doctor had long white mustache and looked like he was an imagery man’. I will describe more about what ‘imagery man’ implies in this story. Also Shaylee said I may want to add why I was taking the test and which grade I was in that time. I think adding this will help readers understand more about the background.
Second, I will paraphrase a little where I’m explaining the reason of the decided answer. Shamus wanted me to paraphrase that part so it does not look too long. I wanted to introduce the readers the specific reason but I will make it shorter without deleting the essential part.
Last, I will bring more details into explaining why this lesson is so important. Mike said I can definitely expend more on this literacy lesson. I will tell more of why literature education should not be aimed for teaching stereotypical lesson. I will also explain more reasonings where there could be some questions to be asked.
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